FAT Girlfriend

By David Lindsay

Comedy & satire, Action & adventure | Paperback, eBook


Jake has hit thirty. Brought up on his older brother’s punk rock collection, his anti-establishment, two-fingered, live-for-today attitude sits uncomfortably with his safe job, good money, stock-options, final salary pension and middle-management diesel with optional heated seats. Just as he thought it couldn’t get any better, it didn’t. Caught in a corporate surreality trap with one of the country’s leading finance companies, Jake realizes that his lifeblood is slowly ebbing away with every sent email. At least the Expressochoc and Vimto are on Free Vend. Just as he begins to understand that he hasn’t got the guts to change his life, it’s changed for him. Enter Lucy Jennings. One time timid accounts assistant, now full time kickboxing, computer hacking, anti-fascist activist with a cause to die for. And a nice arse. Jake is dragged into a struggle he only thought possible in Steven Seagal movies, reluctantly trying to save the world without the aid of a management strategy document or air-conditioning. Suddenly finding himself chased by Nazi fundamentalists; stuck in a student bed-sit with the Welsh version of Laurel and Hardy; jobless; car-less and underestimated by the woman he loves, things couldn’t get any worse for Jake. Yeah, right.


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Jake has hit thirty. Brought up on his older brother’s punk rock collection, his anti-establishment, two-fingered, live-for-today attitude sits uncomfortably with his safe job, good money, stock-options, final salary pension and middle-management diesel with optional heated seats. Just as he thought it couldn’t get any better, it didn’t. Caught in a corporate surreality trap with one of the country’s leading finance companies, Jake realizes that his lifeblood is slowly ebbing away with every sent email. At least the Expressochoc and Vimto are on Free Vend. Just as he begins to understand that he hasn’t got the guts to change his life, it’s changed for him. Enter Lucy Jennings. One time timid accounts assistant, now full time kickboxing, computer hacking, anti-fascist activist with a cau...


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I live in Manchester, England and get up to all sorts of nonsense. Writing keeps me out of trouble ... most of the time. 'FAT Girlfriend' was written alongside working extremely long hours during my employment at The Associates (Citi Financial) and Welcome Finance - if you worked with me at either of these companies then I will probably have either used part of your character or you will recognise the characters of others (there is no one person in this book, though - every character is a figment of my imagination, with a few idiosyncrasies of others thrown in). I completed the book in 2004 and put it in a drawer. Life and successive redundancies took over and nothing happened, but after some encouragement from people who helped me with the initial draft I decided to release it. I've had a great reaction, apart from those people who have read it and have since beaten me up - but, as I've said, it wasn't actually them in the book. Not really. I have almost completed a second book, entitled Sixty Thousand Muppets. This is a novella and collection of short stories which are almost entirely not about football. If you like to laugh, enjoy a good story and don't take life too seriously, then this is for you. Or not - read it and tell me. Thank you for taking the time to read about the author and for reading my work - it is more than appreciated. If you liked it, please tell others via the Amazon Kindle Review page - it may make my next redundancy easier to take.


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I live in Manchester, England and get up to all sorts of nonsense. Writing keeps me out of trouble ... most of the time. 'FAT Girlfriend' was written alongside working extremely long hours during my employment at The Associates (Citi Financial) and Welcome Finance - if you worked with me at either of these companies then I will probably have either used part of your character or you will recognise...


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